the.com/remote
A tiny plastic god you can never find, worshipped from the couch.
button graveyardMost buttons get pressed maybe three times ever
couch abyssStatistically vanishes into cushions on a cosmic schedule
infrared ageMost still beam invisible light, like a 1950s laser
channel surfCoined in 1986 as TV-flipping became a sport
sticky truthAmong the germiest objects in any household